Emotional Wellbeing Relationships Useful Tips

Emotional Manipulation: 8 Ways How To Detect

Emotional manipulation and abuse are very common in today’s world. Learn how to meet the nine warning signs so that you can protect yourself from abuse and manipulation.

Are You Emotionally Manipulated?

Emotional manipulation and abuse happen in relationships. It may be your marriage, your co-worker, your boss, your mother or adult child. In each case, the warning signs are the same. So what are these warning signs? Answer the following questions:

  • Are they jealous or controlling?
  • Do they criticize you?
  • Are they emotionally unstable?
  • Do they always talk negatively about other people?
  • Do they always talk negatively about other people?
  • Do they put your needs second?
  • Do they use emotional blackmail?
  • Have your close friends and family have doubts?
  • Do you walk on the eggshell?

If you answered „yes” to at least one of them, then you are at serious risk of emotional manipulation and abuse. Let me, therefore, comment on each of them.

1. Jealous and Controlling Partner

Jealousy is a very powerful tool of manipulation. The person using it bases on your insecurities. You are intimidated by their anger or accusations. You are facing aggression, not only the open one. And you feel that there is no freedom, no „you,” only the world of your abuser and manipulator.

2. Destructive Criticism

Emotional manipulators and abusers gain control by weakening your sense of self-esteem. This is done by destructive criticism. In the shortest, destructive criticism takes place when your partner attacks you personally, provides no solution apart from criticizing and when he or she is not an expert in the field the criticism concerns.

3. They Are Toxic People

Emotional manipulators and abusers typically feel like victims. Thus, they will talk about how they were hurt by everyone. You may feel sympathy, give them a solution… but their only goal is to boast with their victims. Beware as you can be the next person who „hurt” them.

4. Unpredictable Personality

“You think everything is going fine, and all of a sudden they’re upset, So you can never be sure if your words will not start the spiral of anger and an argument will outbreak Remember that it is not your problem, but theirs. You are not responsible for their emotions, their reactions or words.

5. They Put Your Needs Second

You might start a conversation talking about your thoughts and concerns. However, it ends up being all about them. You have no chance to communicate your needs and negotiate a compromise. This type of people is very chatty, they speak very fast and have a great gift of the gab. But even then you have the right to fight for meeting of your needs.

6.  They Use Emotional Blackmail

Manipulators and abusers can use guilt obligation and fear to cause that you will do what they want. Susan Forward describes it as the FOG, because indeed, the blackmailer is creating the fog, where you cannot see the real life. Any time when someone makes you guilty stop and think if you have not been manipulated

7. You Walk on Eggshells

Do you know such kind of person who can burst with anger because of anything? And when they do, you cannot think of what you did wrong. Instead, you feel the need to apologize to make them feel better. Unfortunately doing so causes that you will ignore your needs to avoid a confrontation.

8. Your Friends and Family Have Doubts

The truth is that not many of my readers do not accept the advice from their family and friends. If you are an adult child, it may be hard for you to hear from your parents that your new boyfriend may be abusive. You are in love and see only good things in him. However, these are your friends and family who know you well and can notice the first signs of being manipulated

Beware of emotional manipulation as it is one of the worst enemy of high self-esteem and self-confidence. Cut off toxic friends and neighbours, set healthy boundaries with your family members or luimit contact if necessary. Good luck

Victoria Herocten

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