8 Proven Ways to Work With Your Inner Child Part 1

child

You have already learnt how to connect with your inner child and how to check his or her health. Today you will learn how to work with your inner child.

How To Work With Your Inner Child

Firstly, let me explain you the difference between being childlish and childlike because there is a big difference here:

Being childish can be thought of as behaving in an immature or naive way. Being childlike on the other hand, can be thought of as a state of purity and innocence.

In the case of the inner child, we focus on its purity and innocence. However, your inner child may be wounded: full of guilt, shame, fear, hatred, self-loathing and anger. We carry them with us, suffering. To get rid of all that baggage we need to heal the child within. And the first and the most important step of this process is earning the trust of our inner child through love and self-nurturing.

1. Identify the type of your child

Although everyone has different childhoods, there are patterns common to most people. You have already learnt when your inner child is wounded.

Check this article

How Healthy is Your Inner Child? Test Yourself

In the case when the relationship with your inner child has dwindled over the years, try to identify what stage of development your childhood is in now. This will help you create a roadmap for bringing your inner child back into your life.

The abandoned child

This inner child grows in a dysfunctional family, where one or both of parents were divorcing or being too busy to spare attention. Abuse or neglect are other examples. You might have the fears of being abandoned and feeling lonely or insecure.

Read more about abusive relationships:

The fearful child

This inner child probably received a lot of criticism from their parents, teacher and other adults. He or she experiences anxiety whenever they fail to get enough affirmation. These children want to prove their worth for every sake

The playful child

This inner child is a healthy, but unfortunately, often neglected aspect of adulthood. The playful child wants to have spontaneous fun and live free from guilt or anxiety. However, in many cases we limit him or her because of the social standards.

2. Choose the Method

However, I have to warn you. Working with your inner child is a very delicate and long-term process. Do not expect the results within a day or even a month. if you were abused for, let’ say 30 years, some time has to pass in order to heal your inner child.

Read the article how to prepare for working with your inner child:

8 Proven Ways to Work With Your Inner Child

Here are the eight most powerful ways to perform inner child work. You can pick up one or work on some of them simultaineously. Test which method is the most efficient in your case. For example, some people prefer writing while others shouting. Some may be too painful at first, e.g. looking at the pictures from the times when you were abused.

1. Speak To Your Inner Child

And say all that your parents did not. Then you can heal your inner child. Acknowledge your inner child and let him or her know that you are there for them. Treat your inner child with kindness and respect.

Start from saying the things which should have been said. We lack the following messages mostly in our lives:

  • …. (YOUR NAME I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU
  • … (YOUR NAME) THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU
  • … (YOUR NAME) I AM SORRY, I AM SORRY, I AM SORRY
  • … (YOUR NAME) I BELIEVE IN YOU
  • … (YOUR NAME) YOU CAN DO IT, YOU CAN DO IT, YOU CAN DO IT
  • … (YOUR NAME) YOU CAN HANDLE IT YOU CAN HANDLE IT, YOU CAN HANDLE IT

Make talking to your inner child a daily practice. ane even more. Every time you look at the mirror, tell your inner child:

  • … (YOUR NAME) YOU ARE AWESOME 🙂

Apart from talking to your inner child in front of the mirror, you can do it dressing up, cleaning your house. You can also record your words and listen to them while going to work. then you will become familiar and accept your voice, which we often dislike.

2. Write

Some people feel more comfortable while writing than speaking. Then start your journal. There are some techiques you can use here:

Asking questions and writing the answers

Write down some questionf to your inner child. If he or she will answer, also write it down. You can cry, shout or surrender to any emotion here as this might be painful at the beginning.

Affirmations

Use some or all of the examples of affirmations given above in my post. it is advisable to write a given affirmation more than once, at least three times. In my practice, I use nine or sometimes even twenty-seven times.

Learn more about using affirmations to be happy:

a letter

Write an apology if you feel like you have neglected your inner child and want to heal that connection. It can also be a simple letter expressing your desire to strengthen the friendship.

However, sometimes it is very hard to write and the emotions can be very painful. You could also want to write a letter full of anger, pain, hurt – from your inner child’s perspective. When you finish, read it and destroy by burning or shredding.

Combined Reading And Speaking

You can combine both speaking and writing. After having written a page of affirmations, read them slowly. While breathing in, imagine yourself as a child being stroked, praised, loved, heard, understood etc. When you breathe out, release all the negative emotions of your inner child, like pain, anger, fear, guilt, shame.

Credits to WikiHow and Loner Woolf

In a Nutshel

Today I have described you the two of eight ways how to work with your inner child in order to heal him or her. Speaking and writing help to release accumulated negative emotions so that the further work will be easier. Check my next post for the next six techiques.

Victoria Herocten

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