Last week my readers deluged me with comments, asking for more information on how to be a happy person. Therefore, I have decided to pick up and present ten plus one most effective tools used in self-help nowadays.
10 + 1 Best Self-Help Tools
Most of these tools are commonly known and you can find hundreds of articles about each one. However, according to my experience, these described below are the most effiecient and the easiest to do.
I have written a couple of articles about affirmations. You need to know how to use them efficiently. Generally writing, they have to concern yourself, be in “I” person, the continuous tense and positive (e.g. smoke-free). Sometimes a bit different structure is necessary (i.e. people say that I…).
2. Do The Cost-Benefit Analysis
This technique can be used to change negative beliefs, but also thoughts. You write down all the costs (i.e. what you will lose) of your thought/belief and benefits (i.e. what you gain). Then you mark each item from 1 to 10 (not important at all – extremely important). Add up the points in each group (i.e. costs and benefits) and notice the balance. Sometimes the balance may be around 0. Then think what biggest pain you would feel if you were stuck to your thought/beleif.
3. Question Beliefs/Thoughts As Self-Help
This method is easy. Use questions to break down the belief and thought. Here are some examples:
- Who has said this? (definitely not all the people)
- Will it really matter in 10 year’s time?
- Is ….. the expert at …? (the thing he/she criticises)
- What does ….. mean? (stupid, idiot and any other negative label of yourself?
- When have you been….? (smart, have done ….. well)
This method can also be used to break negative thoughts and beliefs. You simply write down the arguments supporting a thought/belief and those being against it. Then you mark each argument from 1 to 10 (not true at all – absolutely true) and add up points, like in the cost-benefit analysis. More details and examples in the article linked to the header.
5. Apply The 20 Ideas Self-Help Method
if you use the solution to a given problem, try this method: write down the problem at the top of A4 blank or lined piece of paper. Next, automatically write down any possible solutions without evaluating them. You need to write as long as you have 20 solutions. the first ones will be easy to find, then you need to think much harder. The last ideas are your best solutions. pick up one and start using immediately.
I have written one article about this method. It is useful for channelling negative emotions or thoughts, but also while practising affirmations. Try it today and you will notice how creative you can be creative in your life.
7. Work With Inner Child
There are a couple of articles about the inner child on this blog. Generally writing, you need to meet your inner child first. Next, tame him/her and start saying/writing in a loving way. Never put pressure on your inner child as otherwise, this self-help technique will do more harm than benefit.
8. Apply CBT
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, used in psychology, is a great tool for changing beliefs and automatic negative thoughts. You describe a situation/trigger, generating these thoughts/beliefs, then mark how strong they are. The next step is to write the distortions (e.g. black-and-white thinking, labelling, magnifying the negative, “should” statements). Then an alternative thought is created and an action you will take to minimise the appearance of negative thoughts/beliefs in the future.
9. Use Sentence Completion As Self-Help
Nathaniel Branden has created a brilliant self-help technique, called sentence completion. It works perfectly in the case of low assertiveness, lack of self-responsibility for your life and making gradual changes in your life.
10 Apply SWOT Analysis Of Your Goals
You need to know that in some cases, it may be difficult to achieve your goals. This self-help technique will help you to assess if a given goal is worth trouble. For example, you write your skills and resources possessed as strength. analogically, the resources and skills that you lack will be your weaknesses. Threats stand for external circumstances which may impede the achievement of your goal and opportunities – all that can help you with it. Check the article linked to this self-help tip.
10 + 1. Set SMART Goals
This self-help tool is widely known, not only in business. To achieve it, the goal has to be specified, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-oriented. For example, if you want to lose weight, the goal might be defined as “By the 30th of April 2020 I will weigh 3 kilos less than today.”
In a Nutshell
Today I have presented you the ten useful self-help tools, which used collectively, will massively increase your happiness level, not only at work but in general life ,too, on the physical, emotional and mental level. Good lick.