Domestic Violence: How Abusers Manipulate Their Victims


If you want to stop a toxic or abusive relationship, be prepared that the abusers will try to manipulate you. How do they do it?


Domestic violence and abuse are not due to the abuser’s loss of control over his or her behaviour, although many people have a different opinion on that. In fact, abusive act or violence abuser makes a deliberate choice to control you. Read more.

Abusers Use Denial And Blame

Abusers are excellent at making excuses for the inexcusable. They will blame their abusive and violent behaviour on many factors, e.g. a bad childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse. Your abusive partner may minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred. Read more.

Abusers Use Intimidation

Your abuser may use a variety of intimidation tactics designed to scare you into submission. They include smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting your pets, making threatening looks or gestures, or putting weapons on display. The clear message is that if you do not obey, there will be violent consequences. Read more.

Abusers Use Threats

Abusive partners commonly use threats to keep the victims from leaving or to scare them into dropping charges. Your abuser may threaten to hurt or kill you, your children, other family members, or even pets. More than that,he may also threaten to commit suicide, file false charges against you, or report you to child services. These are the forms of emotional blackmail. Read more.

Abusers Have Unrealistic Expectations

An abuser expects you to meet all of the abuser’s needs, For example, he may want you to call him ten times daily every hour, while you are working and do not call the family then. Another example can be to take care of everything emotionally and domestically, so you have to think about everything.Read more.

Abusers Manifest Controlling Behaviour

In the beginning, an abuser will attribute controlling behaviour to concern for the victim. As an example, your safety or decision-making skills are the reason for using power. As this action progresses the situation will worsen, you have less and less freedom to make own decisions. The abuser may assume all control of finances or prevent you from coming and going freely. The people manifesting such kind of behaviour are toxic men called the angry bullying control freak (by Lillian Glass). Read more.

There are not all the ways abusers manipulate their victims. I will give you more examples in the next post. In the meantime, leave your comment and share this post with your friends. Have a nice day.

Victoria Hrocten

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